A beautiful blessing in disguise

Growing up I had always said I didn't plan on having children until I was at least thirty, but once I hit twenty I was in for a big disguise. I had recently been living on my own with my best friend of about eight years and had recently started a full time job and was enrolled in school full time. I had been enjoying my summer and the comfort of being young and free. But by the end of the summer, I had became sick and I just figured I had caught a cold from my younger sister. A couple weeks later I woke up to the biggest shock of my life. I found out that I was pregnant, and what made the situation a little more shocking it was by an ex that I had no intention on spending my life with, or sharing a child with.

My first feeling was shock ! I thought I was going crazy and seeing things, so I had my roommate come and take a look at the test. Once reality hit me I broke down and began to cry. Not all just because I was upset, I was just feeling all types of emotions. I was upset at myself for being irresponsible, I was scared because I was not sure if I was ready to be a mother. I was nervous because growing up I was so selfish so I was worried I wouldn't be able to love enough. Was I honestly capable of taking care of a child ?I was honestly just overwhelmed in feelings that I just didn't know what to do with myself. But eventually I pulled myself together, cheered myself up and faced reality. I had to face the fact that I was bringing a child into the world and I had to do every and everything to make sure my child would have a wonderful life.

Every appointment I attended my feelings began to grow. When I first heard my sons heartbeat, I became so overwhelmed with love and from that point on nothing else matter. Within the next months, I was able to get an ultra sound and see that there was really someone living inside of me. But when he started moving, my heart felt with so much joy. It was just so comforting, a feeling you cannot explain unless you felt it. On April 10th 2011 at around 6:15pm my life changed for the better. Seeing and holding my son made everything a reality. Life became no more about me, but all about him. Any and everything I did,  I would always think how it would better our lives. Because of him, I became a more forgiving and motivated person. I returned back to school and got a better job to give him what he deserves. I learned to love in a way that I couldn't imagine. I just became a totally different person, in a better way. I believe it is true when people say a child is a blessing in disguise.